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    Validating others

    We are reassuring them that it is okay to have the feelings they have. By "mirroring" someone's feelings, we show them that we are in tune with them.We are demonstrating that we will still accept them after they have shared their feelings. How strongly are you feeling that (on a scale of 0-10)? We feel connected with them and they feel connected with us.Validation is mentioned in Marsha Linehan’s Skills Training Manual for Treating Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).To understand validation we need to understand the biosocial theory of BPD.

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    In other words people with BPD have difficulties regulating several, if not all, their emotions.” There is a biological component and an environmental component.

    A while back I realized something about the ones I’d found most effective when struggling to forgive or accept myself: Many of them involved seeking validation from other people.

    Some of my most effective mood-boosters included: These are all perfectly valid approaches to feeling better, but they all hinge on praise and external support.

    When parents use validation the emotionality of a person with borderline will decrease.

    This strategy will help those with ill spouses and/or ill parents too.

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